So this is the dealio. A week ago after hubby got his vasectomy he comes up to me and tells me that he is unhappy. I proceed to ask him why he is unhappy and he says that he feels as if I do not support him. After talking a while he says that he has been angry with me since we were first married and my refusal to just get up and move at the drop of a hat due to not having any money saved. He says that I was “cut off” from him then and the 4 years that followed to this date. After a long discussion over the weekend, hubby and I agreed that I should stay with my parents for a while so we can both think to ourselves and figure out if we want to be married. Hubby finally came to his senses last Thursday and told me to come home, which I did. This whole “split” was nothing but talk of divorce and I truely thought that was where we were headed. Hubby through talking to everyone in his cellphone realized that you have got to let your anger go and to not keep building it up year after year. When I got back he still refused to put his wedding ring back on. My heart was truly broken. I cried so much thinking that my marriage was going to be over because of some anger that should have been resolved a long time ago. But now hubby has realized that he needs to get some counseling from a pastor to try to work out his anger issues. I am relieved that we are no longer talking about divorce and that we are both trying to work out issues to get this marriage back on course. He thinks that he is going through a mid-life crisis and with the vasectomy stirred up a lot of past emotions. I appreciate everyone keeping my family in your prayers. We are doing a lot better but still have a long road to go down.

Today, I asked hubby if he would start wearing his wedding ring again and he agreed. My heart nearly skipped a beat. It never used to bother me that he didn’t wear his wedding ring due to it irritating his finger or whatever but now seeing him wear it gives me a since a peace. Peace that he does truly love me like he says he does and that we are going to get past this ugly divorce thing and never look back. We have planned to start going to church together on a regular basis depending on his work schedule so that will be great for the whole family.

All we can do is move forward. Marriage is a lot of work and you just can’t throw in the towel anytime it gets a little rocky. I know we will be better off grounded in the Lord. Through him all things are possible.

I admit that after having two kids and moving twice you just kind of get stuck in a rut with one another but now each day brings a new light. Everytime he says “I love you” brings more joy to my heart. I saw how quickly my life as I see it now could go away in an instant, so every moment I try to hold dear. I don’t want to take this wonderful life that God and hubby has provided for me for granted one more day. I want to make it the best that I possibly can.

One thing that I am wanting to change to get us out of our old marriage rut is to do more things together. With kids it is hard but watching a DVD together or sitting down as a family eating supper are all things that can bring us closer together as a family unit.

We will get through this and we will be stronger than ever!

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