The Poop Episode

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Dear Baby Bean (1 year 1 month old),

Who knew that you would grow up so quickly. Who knew that within the matter of a day you would manage to teach yourself how to remove your diaper. Take a nice gross poop while uncovered, and manage to smear it all over your crib, you, and in places where poop definitely should not be. You woke us up at four in the morning with a present we did not expect! Daddy handed me to you and I quickly gave you a bath to get all the yuckies off. While you were getting clean in the bathtub, Daddy was in your room cleaning up “your masterpiece” from all four corners of your crib. Nice one, Bean. You really know how to wake us all up with a bang (and very foul smell I must add).

From this day forth, you go to bed with pants always on. From this day forth, gone are your days of freedom. Running around the house in just a diaper. Not no more my friend. You know a new trick now and it is one that mommy doesn’t really approve of.

If I were you, I would learn a new trick. That way you can go back to being the carefree baby that we all know and love, not this little poop monster we saw the other morning.

Love Always,

The Domestic Diva

Heather is a homeschooling mom of two boys currently living in central Georgia. She has been sharing her domestic story online as a blogger for 13 years. Through her blog and social media platforms, Heather provides a glimpse into domestic life as she shares with other stay-at-home moms how she tackles modern homemaking with the challenges of raising a family.

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  1. June 17, 2008 / 12:33 am

    Haha! Oh Diva, I would feel sorry for you, but that’s just so funny!

    Now you need to print and save this, so that someday (MANY years from now), when Mr. Bean brings home his first date, you can pull this out to show her. Or on the night before his wedding, show his fiancee so that she will know what she is marrying. I can see his horror now…

    :) God bless you for all the hard work you do – even when he spreads poop all over everything.

  2. Anonymous Mom
    June 17, 2008 / 1:27 am

    IF this is as bad as it gets, consider yourself lucky. I was talking about my son’s poop for 5 years (when he finally pooped in the toilet for the first time) and I have a friend with an eight year old son who still hasn’t gotten out of the poop stage with him. My daughtter (age 7) recently wiped some on the wall for no explicable reason. You expect to change diapers, but you don’t expect how central a focus it will be for YEARS to come.

    (I’m posting anymously so that noone can ever track back these stories to them via my name. AFter all, the internet has a very long life, and who knows, my daughter might want to run for President some day!)

  3. June 17, 2008 / 2:37 am

    Our sons + poop = a very messy equation.

  4. June 17, 2008 / 4:34 am

    How funny is that!!! Although, I’m sure it was not funny at 4 am!

  5. June 17, 2008 / 9:58 am

    Awesome funny post :)) Agree with Melinda, you should save this post for the future. :))
    This is the way how a real Diva handle such poopie situations :D

    ….. Still laughing….. :)

  6. Dawn Papandrea-Khan
    June 17, 2008 / 11:02 am

    That is hilarious! It has happened to me with BOTH my children. I feel your frustration. :) But it HAS to happen to EVERY mommy, so we can laugh years down the road when it happens to them and their children.

  7. June 18, 2008 / 1:27 pm

    Okay…that was hilarious! Although I really shouldn’t be laughing b/c I may have it coming back to me in about a year…

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